The powerful feelings I have for people have to be broken. Not my family, though. Like Amber or Mum or Kyra. Like…my friends. Not that I don’t love them but it’s just unnecesary. I shouldn’t need to have feelings for school chums. Like..EmoBlondie, Loosy, Billy, TootleButtons, and various others…I don’t wnat to be a total loner but I don’t want to be betrayed..Like in One Silent Night. Stryker loved everyone around him, humans and his father Apollo. He would do anything for them. He also loved his wife at 14 Zephyra. His father, Apollo, told him that if he didn’t marry the girl he had choosen for him he would rape and beat Zephrya untill she was dead. Stryker had no choice but to leave Zephrya, and his unborn daughter, and obey his father’s wishes. When he left the humans betrayed Zephrya and tried to kill her daughter. Stryker was betrayed by everyone he thought her loved. Well not Zephyra, yet. She tries to kill him later on…I don’t believe I can trust very many people. Not saying that EmoBlondie isn’t trustworthy but..They have done it before. With good intentions indeed but I don’t like double standards. I know their hearts were in the right place, and I am not holding any grudges, but it was some form of bretrayl. I still want to be your friend and I will try my best to act the same, but I know the truth about myself and I will not trust people who I feel don’t deserve it. 

Sorry if I am hurting any feelings but I made up my choice a while back. It is so hard to trust people after that fateful night…Dont ask. Whoever cares..

Imagine a world with magic and love…Imagine a world where people took in what their actions would do to other people and there was no betrayl and there was justice and truth..No destruction and lies..Everyone loved everyone and everything was beautiful and happy..

That would be my kind of world. The one where I could love and feel what wasn’t wrong or right, but normal. Where I could know what other people felt because there would be no secret’s..You would feel what was right because there would be no wrong and no one would hold you responsible for your actions..Tata. ❤

UPDATED: Read About The Fabulous Me! EmoBlondie. I wrote some new stuff in UPDATED on the bottom of the screen. 🙂


7 Responses to “DECISION”

  1. 1 bigcitysoundgirl
    June 14, 2009 at 2:12 am

    You’re right, you don’t have to care about me. But it’s a decision I MADE to care about you. You know a betrayal is when people hurt you to SEE you hurt. When someone goes out of their way to HELP you, it’s you who’s betraying their friendship because we decided to care about you…

    So, if you have to think about caring for me, would you go out of your way and help me?


    • 2 similala26
      June 14, 2009 at 3:39 am

      You sound mad…
      And yes I know what a betrayl is EmoBlondie.

      I would help you if you needed help but I am just saying that I don’t know if I could trust some people.

    • 3 similala26
      June 14, 2009 at 3:46 am

      I still care about you! I just have to care not as much.. 🙂
      It could really hurt me some day if I don’t.
      Do you remember what I said in BAND CLASS + CHANGE?
      I can’t be like that anymore.
      So vulnerable. I have to be strong.
      I hope you’ll understand…:)
      I still love you ❤

  2. 4 bigcitysoundgirl
    June 14, 2009 at 6:48 am

    Do what you wish sim, but I warn you, if you tell yourself not to care so much about certain people, those people will drift. They’ll seek people who will give them the same amount of care and respect as they do for the other person. So you might one day be like “darn, I wish I had showed that person how much they meant to me, because golly gee I sure as hell meant a lot to them.”
    Strength is a state of mind. You are a strong person if you can maintain a relationship with someone, because some bonds last forever. But that’s not because of fate, that’s because the people cared about keeping the bond tight.
    It’s okay to be vulnerable, showing emotion will keep your energy flowing. Being vulnerable will remind you you’re human, and humans have emotion.

    • 5 similala26
      June 15, 2009 at 2:31 am

      Okay so I do not understand! Are you mad at me for choosing what I have? Or do you understand? Or do you not care?
      BTW. Being vulnerable is not OK. It gives people the power to take advantage of me and hurt me. That’s not good.

      • 6 bigcitysoundgirl
        June 15, 2009 at 11:27 pm

        What don’t you understand? I expressed how I felt on the issue. I’m not mad at you whatsoever. I’m just saying that I don’t understand how you feel so strongly that you have to ‘not care as much’ about people that ‘care so much’ about you. It’s unfair to those people.It’s unfair to me.


  3. 7 similala26
    June 15, 2009 at 11:35 pm

    I just don’t want to get betrayed like Stryker…:))

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Twilight, as you all know, is my favorite thing in the whole wide world. So I decided to put quotes on here. I want to put 3 quotes a day from now on. Here are my favorite quotes:

You know, Jacob, you’re awfully self-righteous — considering that you’re a werewolf and all.
Bella Swan, Eclipse, Chapter 4, p.111

Well… don’t be offended, but you smell like a dog.
Edward Cullen, Eclipse, Chapter 6, p.144

I was all braced for the wrath that was going to put grizzlies to shame, and this is what I get? I should infuriate you more often.
Edward Cullen, Eclipse, Chapter 8, p.186

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